On the Slippery Slope

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When no one was looking last night, I got a phone number. And even if anyone was looking, I'm sure it appeared innocent enough. Just a pretty, seemingly straight girl and a cute, little lesbian exchanging numbers. Maybe they both need friends or someone to hang out with. Yes, I'm positive that's exactly what it looked like.

So you know, appearances can be deceiving. I know why I wanted her number and I'm reasonably certain she wanted mine for the same reason. Oh, we'll hang out. But not with the intention of becoming friends. I know better. "Hanging out" usually leads to something else in my world. Especially when the players (pardon the terminology) seem a bit too curious about each other. For example, I don't recall what my friends were wearing the first time I ever saw them. And well, she remembers a certain pair of khaki shorts and yellow t-shirt. This is scary (in a good way for everyone except her current girlfriend), because she's right. Please, note that was not the day I met her. That didn't happen for at least another week or more. She remembers what I was wearing the first time she ever saw me. So yeah... hanging out...? Sure, with a specific goal in mind. Just about every time I "hang out" with a pretty girl, I walk away with a girlfriend. Or a rodeo. Whichever comes first.

Right now in the light of day and the waning moments of the hangover, I'm contemplating a few things. Do I use the number? Do I invite her to "hang out"? Keep in mind she has a girlfriend. That's usually not my M.O., especially when I like the girlfriend. I can't believe I'm even thinking about it. It's so not me. I hate drama. Hate it. And this is exactly where drama comes from. Pursue a woman with a girlfriend? Yeah, that's a slippery slope right into Lesbian Drama Central. My rationalization (for better or worse)? Her girlfriend is frightfully young and far too young for her. The age difference is going to make for problems soon enough. If they're not going to last anyway, why can't I just speed up the process?

I know, I know. You might be desperate if... Okay, so it's a really crappy rationalization. How about this? I need friends and she says she needs friends. What if I use her number with the intention of actually just hanging out? Now, I can't speak for her intention, but it'll be mine. She's the one with the girlfriend so if I let her lead, it's cool, right? Wrong. I know, it's wrong. Well, damn. I don't know what to do. OK, I've decided. I'm going to ask her to hang out and assume that we both have every intention to JUST hang out. Good enough?

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