The Product of Near Exhaustion
I've been sitting here nearly forty-five minutes trying to write. I should write and I want to write. I had so much fun last Friday night drinking and writing that I wanted to do it again tonight. However, after the week I've had, all I can muster are a few false starts and a bunch of short thoughts that don't amount to much of anything. For example...
* I hope the sweet tea I had with dinner (and the sweet tea I'm mixing with my remaining sweet tea flavored vodka) will keep me awake past 8:30. How bad was my week? I've been so exhausted that I've gone to bed before 9:00pm four days in a row. And slept straight through 'til my alarm at 6:00am.
* I should probably bag writing for tonight and watch a movie. Something easy, though, and with lots of action. I am far too exhausted to put too much thought into anything.
* My lyric for today? From Maroon 5, 'Misery'... 'The way it feels to be... Completely intertwined'. The rest of the song is a little whiny for my taste, but that lyric caught my attention. Go figure.
As you can see, I'm not good for much right about now. It's a damn good thing I like my job (and need some extra money) otherwise I'd be pissed about how hard and how much I had to work this week. The good news is that it's only going to get worse from here. After next week, I'm fukt. Totally and completely fukt. But if the overtime gets approved, I'll be rich (OK, I'll be able to more efficiently pay my bills). I hope that my strength and stamina improve so I'm not so damn tired every night. The best part about all this? I'm not going to need a gym membership for another month or so. Work has become a kick-ass work-out. I consider that good news, even if I can't stay awake until the street lights come on.
So, yes... I'm a bit scattered tonight. I'm hoping some rest and a good night's sleep will fix me up and get me ready for a good weekend of writing (Of course, I've been sleeping 9 1/2 hours a night. I'm not sure how much more sleep my body needs). I'm don't know what it says about me that I'd rather spend my Friday night (and my holiday weekend) writing. Please don't answer that. I really don't want to know. I think I got the gist (especially since I just used the word 'gist').
* I'm disappointed that my sweet tea vodka is almost gone. Just go out and buy more? Yeah, if I wasn't in a huge debt reduction phase and trying not to spend ANY money.
* Speaking of... I may not have energy to write tonight, but I'd love a road trip. All I need is an open highway, a fast car...and money for gas. I had an exceptionally cool idea today - Some weekend I want to pick a destination (Biloxi, New Orleans, Hot Springs...? As I think about it... There are a lot of BFE destinations a day's drive from Austin... Argh), drive part of Saturday to get there, get a hotel, hangout for the night, and drive home on Sunday. Maybe one day when I come back into some money.
* I wish I had the ability to relax, but I just don't. That's the only thing the Anti-Everything drug wasn't anti. I couldn't sleep, but I could lay there and watch four movies in a row.
I'm not sure what to do with myself tonight given that I don't have the brain power to write or the energy to do anything else. I'm pretty uni-dimensional now that I think about it. How do I spend my time? The 3W's - Work, Write, Walk. Boring and borderline unproductive, I know. If I lay down to watch TV or read (blech), I'll get bored and decide to go to sleep. Sleep beats boredom and it's the only way I seem to be able to relax these days.
I'm actually quite aggravating. I hope no one else has taken notice. So before anyone does, I'm out. Holla.
* I hope the sweet tea I had with dinner (and the sweet tea I'm mixing with my remaining sweet tea flavored vodka) will keep me awake past 8:30. How bad was my week? I've been so exhausted that I've gone to bed before 9:00pm four days in a row. And slept straight through 'til my alarm at 6:00am.
* I should probably bag writing for tonight and watch a movie. Something easy, though, and with lots of action. I am far too exhausted to put too much thought into anything.
* My lyric for today? From Maroon 5, 'Misery'... 'The way it feels to be... Completely intertwined'. The rest of the song is a little whiny for my taste, but that lyric caught my attention. Go figure.
As you can see, I'm not good for much right about now. It's a damn good thing I like my job (and need some extra money) otherwise I'd be pissed about how hard and how much I had to work this week. The good news is that it's only going to get worse from here. After next week, I'm fukt. Totally and completely fukt. But if the overtime gets approved, I'll be rich (OK, I'll be able to more efficiently pay my bills). I hope that my strength and stamina improve so I'm not so damn tired every night. The best part about all this? I'm not going to need a gym membership for another month or so. Work has become a kick-ass work-out. I consider that good news, even if I can't stay awake until the street lights come on.
So, yes... I'm a bit scattered tonight. I'm hoping some rest and a good night's sleep will fix me up and get me ready for a good weekend of writing (Of course, I've been sleeping 9 1/2 hours a night. I'm not sure how much more sleep my body needs). I'm don't know what it says about me that I'd rather spend my Friday night (and my holiday weekend) writing. Please don't answer that. I really don't want to know. I think I got the gist (especially since I just used the word 'gist').
* I'm disappointed that my sweet tea vodka is almost gone. Just go out and buy more? Yeah, if I wasn't in a huge debt reduction phase and trying not to spend ANY money.
* Speaking of... I may not have energy to write tonight, but I'd love a road trip. All I need is an open highway, a fast car...and money for gas. I had an exceptionally cool idea today - Some weekend I want to pick a destination (Biloxi, New Orleans, Hot Springs...? As I think about it... There are a lot of BFE destinations a day's drive from Austin... Argh), drive part of Saturday to get there, get a hotel, hangout for the night, and drive home on Sunday. Maybe one day when I come back into some money.
* I wish I had the ability to relax, but I just don't. That's the only thing the Anti-Everything drug wasn't anti. I couldn't sleep, but I could lay there and watch four movies in a row.
I'm not sure what to do with myself tonight given that I don't have the brain power to write or the energy to do anything else. I'm pretty uni-dimensional now that I think about it. How do I spend my time? The 3W's - Work, Write, Walk. Boring and borderline unproductive, I know. If I lay down to watch TV or read (blech), I'll get bored and decide to go to sleep. Sleep beats boredom and it's the only way I seem to be able to relax these days.
I'm actually quite aggravating. I hope no one else has taken notice. So before anyone does, I'm out. Holla.
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