The Faux Hangover
Right now I'm trying to cure my 'hangover' with Twizzlers and Diet Coke. Thus far a mango margarita, Mexican food, forty ounces of water, and thirty-two ounces of Blue G2 Gatorade haven't worked. At this point, I'm willing to try anything. Of course, when I bit into the first Twizzler I had a flashback to a time somewhere in my childhood when I barfed Red Vines. So, no... The Twizzlers have done little to quell the nausea. Gotta love a 'hangover'. Especially this one.
I had a couple drinks with a friend last night to celebrate the sale of my first book, but I wasn't drunk. I mixed light enough and barely caught a buzz. I woke up early feeling great. I ate some breakfast, drank some coffee, listened to some music, wrote the Krispy Kreme donut blog, had a very productive physical therapy session for my shoulder, and went for a run. The day was near perfect until the dehydration set in. You see, I'm not very good at re-hydrating. After last night's really awesome five mile run, I drank next to nothing (except rum and diet root beer). Then this morning I had a few sips of water with my cereal but quickly switched to coffee. And then I ran.
About halfway through this morning's run my body became suspicious and unhappy. I'm pretty sure it was pissed about my level of hydration because it started to rebel slightly. My initial reasonably fast pace slowed exponentially and I started feeling nauseous. I've never puked after (or during) a run before, but at one point, I was dead certain that today would be the day. Luckily I got back to the house and into the air conditioning before my dehydration could turn into a more serious heat illness. I immediately started drinking water, but by the time I got in the shower my kidneys hurt and my vision was fucked (I think 'fucked' is the technical term when everything you look at has an arching vapor trail surrounding it). After my shower I continued drinking but switched to the Gatorade hoping it might provide quicker replenishment. Feeling moderately better, I took some generic Aleve and I left for my lunch 'date'.
The mango margarita and Mexican food helped a little for little awhile. After chatting with friends for a few hours, I walked out of the restaurant and hit the bright sunlight. It was then that I realized I felt totally and completely hungover. AND I DIDN'T GET TO HAVE ANY FUN GETTING THIS WAY! On the way home, I stopped to get a fountain Diet Coke, thinking it might could work a miracle. Maybe all I needed was a little caffeine. Uh, no. Then I saw the Twizzlers on the coffee table (thanks, Roomie) and the rest is (faux) 'hangover' history.
Thank you, God. I have learned my lesson. You might think that there isn't any Grace in a superlatively crappy run, the aforementioned vapor trail vision, and an insidious case of nausea, however I am here to tell you different. Today I learned all about the Glory of good hydration. I won't make the same mistake again. Proper hydration prevents hangovers, faux and otherwise. Now if only I had regular access to IVs. Of course, that means needles. Yeah, I think I'll just drink a lot of water from here on.
I had a couple drinks with a friend last night to celebrate the sale of my first book, but I wasn't drunk. I mixed light enough and barely caught a buzz. I woke up early feeling great. I ate some breakfast, drank some coffee, listened to some music, wrote the Krispy Kreme donut blog, had a very productive physical therapy session for my shoulder, and went for a run. The day was near perfect until the dehydration set in. You see, I'm not very good at re-hydrating. After last night's really awesome five mile run, I drank next to nothing (except rum and diet root beer). Then this morning I had a few sips of water with my cereal but quickly switched to coffee. And then I ran.
About halfway through this morning's run my body became suspicious and unhappy. I'm pretty sure it was pissed about my level of hydration because it started to rebel slightly. My initial reasonably fast pace slowed exponentially and I started feeling nauseous. I've never puked after (or during) a run before, but at one point, I was dead certain that today would be the day. Luckily I got back to the house and into the air conditioning before my dehydration could turn into a more serious heat illness. I immediately started drinking water, but by the time I got in the shower my kidneys hurt and my vision was fucked (I think 'fucked' is the technical term when everything you look at has an arching vapor trail surrounding it). After my shower I continued drinking but switched to the Gatorade hoping it might provide quicker replenishment. Feeling moderately better, I took some generic Aleve and I left for my lunch 'date'.
The mango margarita and Mexican food helped a little for little awhile. After chatting with friends for a few hours, I walked out of the restaurant and hit the bright sunlight. It was then that I realized I felt totally and completely hungover. AND I DIDN'T GET TO HAVE ANY FUN GETTING THIS WAY! On the way home, I stopped to get a fountain Diet Coke, thinking it might could work a miracle. Maybe all I needed was a little caffeine. Uh, no. Then I saw the Twizzlers on the coffee table (thanks, Roomie) and the rest is (faux) 'hangover' history.
Thank you, God. I have learned my lesson. You might think that there isn't any Grace in a superlatively crappy run, the aforementioned vapor trail vision, and an insidious case of nausea, however I am here to tell you different. Today I learned all about the Glory of good hydration. I won't make the same mistake again. Proper hydration prevents hangovers, faux and otherwise. Now if only I had regular access to IVs. Of course, that means needles. Yeah, I think I'll just drink a lot of water from here on.
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