Next Tuesday

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I've decided that instead of railing against it, I'm going to embrace it. Women don't stick around long in my world. Hallelujah! I am blessed. Some may disagree. They want something a little closer to forever than next Tuesday and think everyone else should as well. I, myself, am cool enough with next Tuesday. I could very well be bored by next Wednesday anyway so why worry about it?

Let me go back a moment and recount a conversation between me and one of my friends this past weekend...

Me: So, I kinda like this straight girl.

Friend: Do you really want to go down that path again?

Me: What path?

Friend: The path that'll get you hurt.

Me: Look, it's not like all that.

Friend: How so?

Me: I don't want a girlfriend and neither does she. It's perfect, really.

Friend: Ah... That makes sense.

I have long gotten crap from friends about my straight girl crushes. Now, I admit that in the distant past, I let them get the better of me. I actually believed that they wanted a girlfriend and I led myself down a disastrous path. In the end, my beliefs were shattered and they went on with their straight lives. It took a minute, but I finally learned a very valuable lesson - They're straight. Duh. There are no toaster ovens in the real world, friends. None. Nada. Zilch. Gay is gay. Straight is straight. And conversion is rare. I have certain gifts and skills, but none of them involve turned straight girls gay.

So, here I sit crushing on a straight girl. I have two things going for me - 1) I don't believe for a moment she wants to be gay and 2) I don't want a girlfriend any more than she does. At the risk of sounding slutty (and getting an email from my mom about it), I'm not interested in dating. Dating is what you do when you want to see if you want to date more and maybe end up in a committed relationship. For the record, 98% of lesbians want to date. Assuredly so do 98% of straight girls, just not when they're flirting with a lesbian.

Ok, so if I don't want to date, what do I want to do? Simple. Flirt and hook up. God help me I don't want to end up like a Nicholas Sparks novel or a Taylor Swift song. I want inexpensive and moderately tawdry. I have my own place so it's not like I'll be renting a sleazy hotel room or laying down the back seats in my Xterra. Hell, I'll buy her drinks and dinner and hang out awhile; I like her as a person, too. However, that said, I will not entertain the thought of anything beyond next Tuesday. Today is today and I'm good with that.

And if you asked my straight girl what she might consider doing with me, I think she'd say the same thing - flirt and hook up. She'd probably like the idea of drinks and hanging out, but I don't imagine she's considering anything beyond next Tuesday either. Straight girls are resolutely about today when it comes to lesbians crushing on them. They most certainly aren't dreaming of anything permanent.

Thank GOD. Let's go back to the statistic that I mentioned above - 98% of lesbians want a girlfriend. Now, let me add another - 0% of straight girls want a girlfriend. Given that I am one of the 2% who don't want a girlfriend, straight girls are a perfect solution. I get to flirt, hang out, and hook up without the mess of assumptions, guilt, and the drama that invariably comes along with them. No one has to lie or cheat or steal to get away from anyone. When we're done, we're done and we go back to being a straight girl and a lesbian. Sweet, huh?

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