Practicing Platonically
'I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much
less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.'
~ Gilbert Godfrey
Thankfully this is not me. Oh, no one wants to see me naked (I'd argue they're missing out, however that's a topic for another blog entirely), but I do have plenty of platonic relationships. I 'date' a lot and have women who love me. I even have a couple who claim to be in love with me. Platonically, of course. Damn, platonically.
I'm not saying that I wish they saw me romantically. Eek. That would seriously weird me out. After so many years on the Friends' Shelf, I can't see them as anything but platonic. In many cases, it'd be like kissing my sister. My stunningly beautiful, sexy, gorgeous sister, but incestuous nonetheless. I can't go there. The die has been cast and I'm pretty sure we are well beyond the point of no return.
Love is a good thing. It is. Platonic. Romantic. It really doesn't matter. Well, until it does. At this point, I'm getting a wee bit tired of platonic love. Not that I want to give up what I've got or work some kind of transition with one of my platonic girlfriends. It's just that it would be really cool to have something more for a change. Or have someone want me for more for a change. I'm not saying I'd reciprocate, but I'd enjoy having the option.
I've been 'dating' this great girl for a few weeks now. Part of me wishes I was dating her (minus the quotation marks), but most of me is good with what I've got. 'Dating', as I've stated before, is safe and non-anxiety producing. So what do we do on our 'dates'? Mostly just hang out - eat, walk, play cards, play games, talk. It's not exciting by most standards, but it suits me (and her, I think) just fine. She makes a damn fine platonic girlfriend and I'm sure she'll make someone a damn fine (real) girlfriend one day soon.
Of course, that person won't be me. I'm not stupid. It has occurred to me that I'm walking down a dead-end street. If I spend all my time with a (straight) platonic girlfriend and everyone assumes that we are sleeping together (which they invariably do. The facial expressions are often priceless when their assumptions hit conscious thought), how will I ever meet anyone to date romantically?
Well, fuck me running. It's a damn Catch-22. I enjoy my platonic 'girlfriend' immensely; thus far she's exactly what I'd want in a (real) girlfriend. I don't want to stop hanging out with her. However, every moment with her is a moment I'm not looking for someone else. I tell myself that I'm practicing on her, so that when I get to the real thing again, I'll know what to do. Truthfully, I don't need to practice being sweet, I need to practice getting back on the bicycle. Given she's my platonic girlfriend, I won't getting THAT kind of practice anytime soon. So, yeah... Christ on a pogo stick.
I guess she's changed my mind about a few things. I usually say I love being single and I do. I love my worry-free, free-free existence, but there's something to be said about having someone. I like having plans made for me and that someone knows my work schedule better than I do. I like having somewhere to go and someone to go with. I suppose it's okay if all that comes platonically, but... There's always a 'but' that trips me up. In this case, it's affection. I miss affection.
Ugh... I really don't know what I want. I know I've written quite bit recently on this topic. I'm confused. She confuses me, but not in the way many may assume. I know where she stands and where I stand with her. Maybe it would be better to say that she makes me think, just not about her (Okay, a little about her but only in my weaker moments).
I suppose this all whittles down to one small conclusion - It seems like I could be open to dating someone. In the words of one of my ex-girlfriends, 'Can open, worms everywhere' (I think Chandler Bing also said it, but the Ex said it better). Oy. I think I need to go breathe into a paper bag. Thank God, it's a moot point and will more than likely stay that way for a sizable duration. For now, I guess I'll keep practicing platonically. And see if I can clean up some of these worms.
~ Gilbert Godfrey
Thankfully this is not me. Oh, no one wants to see me naked (I'd argue they're missing out, however that's a topic for another blog entirely), but I do have plenty of platonic relationships. I 'date' a lot and have women who love me. I even have a couple who claim to be in love with me. Platonically, of course. Damn, platonically.
I'm not saying that I wish they saw me romantically. Eek. That would seriously weird me out. After so many years on the Friends' Shelf, I can't see them as anything but platonic. In many cases, it'd be like kissing my sister. My stunningly beautiful, sexy, gorgeous sister, but incestuous nonetheless. I can't go there. The die has been cast and I'm pretty sure we are well beyond the point of no return.
Love is a good thing. It is. Platonic. Romantic. It really doesn't matter. Well, until it does. At this point, I'm getting a wee bit tired of platonic love. Not that I want to give up what I've got or work some kind of transition with one of my platonic girlfriends. It's just that it would be really cool to have something more for a change. Or have someone want me for more for a change. I'm not saying I'd reciprocate, but I'd enjoy having the option.
I've been 'dating' this great girl for a few weeks now. Part of me wishes I was dating her (minus the quotation marks), but most of me is good with what I've got. 'Dating', as I've stated before, is safe and non-anxiety producing. So what do we do on our 'dates'? Mostly just hang out - eat, walk, play cards, play games, talk. It's not exciting by most standards, but it suits me (and her, I think) just fine. She makes a damn fine platonic girlfriend and I'm sure she'll make someone a damn fine (real) girlfriend one day soon.
Of course, that person won't be me. I'm not stupid. It has occurred to me that I'm walking down a dead-end street. If I spend all my time with a (straight) platonic girlfriend and everyone assumes that we are sleeping together (which they invariably do. The facial expressions are often priceless when their assumptions hit conscious thought), how will I ever meet anyone to date romantically?
Well, fuck me running. It's a damn Catch-22. I enjoy my platonic 'girlfriend' immensely; thus far she's exactly what I'd want in a (real) girlfriend. I don't want to stop hanging out with her. However, every moment with her is a moment I'm not looking for someone else. I tell myself that I'm practicing on her, so that when I get to the real thing again, I'll know what to do. Truthfully, I don't need to practice being sweet, I need to practice getting back on the bicycle. Given she's my platonic girlfriend, I won't getting THAT kind of practice anytime soon. So, yeah... Christ on a pogo stick.
I guess she's changed my mind about a few things. I usually say I love being single and I do. I love my worry-free, free-free existence, but there's something to be said about having someone. I like having plans made for me and that someone knows my work schedule better than I do. I like having somewhere to go and someone to go with. I suppose it's okay if all that comes platonically, but... There's always a 'but' that trips me up. In this case, it's affection. I miss affection.
Ugh... I really don't know what I want. I know I've written quite bit recently on this topic. I'm confused. She confuses me, but not in the way many may assume. I know where she stands and where I stand with her. Maybe it would be better to say that she makes me think, just not about her (Okay, a little about her but only in my weaker moments).
I suppose this all whittles down to one small conclusion - It seems like I could be open to dating someone. In the words of one of my ex-girlfriends, 'Can open, worms everywhere' (I think Chandler Bing also said it, but the Ex said it better). Oy. I think I need to go breathe into a paper bag. Thank God, it's a moot point and will more than likely stay that way for a sizable duration. For now, I guess I'll keep practicing platonically. And see if I can clean up some of these worms.
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