Back to Jane

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I've learned that I can only handle so much frustration. Right now is not good, not good at all. I'm overwhelmed. My usually easy-going-it's-whatever personality is being pushed to the limit. I am financially, personally, sexually, physically, professionally, and geographically frustrated. Add to that my dead computer? Yeah, that's why the hair had to go today.

I just couldn't take one more morning of bed-head or another really long, stray gray hair (to be thankfully plucked by one of my cashiers) or the way it didn't lay right over my ears or the way it bugged the ever-loving crap out of me on a daily basis. Yes, I do recall the "hair pulling" discussion from a few weeks back. That's all well and good, however I am no longer in a position to be in that position with any regularity. Therefore the hair had to go. Today.

Now with GI Jane starring back at me in the mirror, I feel ever so slightly less frustrated. If only I could come into some money, find a good, loyal girlfriend and/or a halfway decent fuck buddy, make myself eat better and go to the gym, and suddenly find myself closer to all the friends I miss so much, life would be absolutely perfect. What about the professional frustration I mentioned above? Thankfully that one will be solved on January 4th, if I can live that long.

I'm not sure what to do about the rest of my frustration. Drink more? There is always that. I hate to. I already feel like I'm drinking too much as it is (please note - I shaved my head completely sober). But something does have to give. I can't live like this. As happy as I am with my new non-frustrating hair, I'm still not happy. Not really. I have too much pulling on my psyche. This and that, that and this. I'm not sure how much longer I can take it. I may yet have to look at pharmaceutical solutions. Lexaslow, here I come. Again.

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