Love, Like Forever

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I haven't said the word out loud yet. It's been in my head and I've written it, but I haven't said it. Oh, I've said it before, just not in this context and most certainly not about her or to her. And really, maybe I'll never have to say it. Maybe the reality I see in the distance like an approaching Cat 5 hurricane won't turn out to be real. Maybe we'll escape it this time. Maybe life will go on as it always has.

It's not that I'm afraid because I'm not. I have God on my side, on our side, and as such I know everything will be ok. Not 'miracle cure' ok, but ok nonetheless. There will be Grace. My faith and trust will create it even if it doesn't apear on its own.

I wasn't given a choice, not a real choice anyway. God knows what I will do. He does. He knows, as with everything else that's been thrown at me or created by my own hand, I'll stand. I'll choose strength over weakness and weather the storm. Eventually, if I have to say the word, I'll say it. Then I'll hold on and love her through it. Because if I know one thing, I know that love, like forever, is infinite.

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