Menage a Drama
Where to start? I want to talk about drama and why I hate it. I'm sure to many all that is self-evident. Drama sucks. Why would I want to be a part of it? Ah, good question. I ask that one a lot to my friends who never seem to shake the drama that consistently envelops their lives. Their answer? I hate drama, can't stand it, try to avoid it. My answer? Really? Seriously, you try to avoid it? Well, I'm here to tell you that you suck at it.
And that's where the rubber meets the road. I'm not going to make this a gay vs straight blog, not intentionally anyway. Gays have a lot of drama and I'm sure straights have an equal share. It's just that gay drama seems to splash in my direction while straight drama (as long as I'm not giving the impression that I'm pursuing someone's girlfriend or wife) keeps it's distance. I think it has to do with guilt by association or something. I'm gay so gay drama wants me. On the other hand, straight drama apparently doesn't even know I'm alive.
Thank God. At least there's someplace I can go to avoid drama. If it happens to be the straight world, so be it. It's funny watching young lesbians learn this lesson. They quiz me and quiz me and look at me with disdain when I talk about my straight friends. 'Who's going to have your back when the shit goes down?' is a familiar question. Interesting, shit seldom goes down around straight people, at least not shit I'm involved it. So, yeah... That's a moot point in my book. Then one day they see the light and tell me that they're tired of the drama and prefer hanging out with straight people. Realization comes eventually to all that want it.
In a nutshell, this is why I have few gay friends and even fewer close gay friends. Invariably they come with drama. It may not be right away, but sooner or later it's going to rear it's ugly head. God help anyone in the splash zone. At that point, as I see the tidal wave coming, I usually run. Sure it makes me seem like a shitty friend. 'I thought you'd have my back when the shit went down'. Uh, no. Bad assumption. Remember all our conversations about drama? Yeah, well... I was serious. I hate it to the point where I just don't do it. I usually return when the dust clears, but when dealing with my lesbian friends I always keep my running shoes handy.
Oh, I've been around plenty of straight drama. I run from that, too. My burden is simply less in that world. I guess my straight friends see me as different from them and as such (thankfully) not a key player in their menage a drama. When I run, they don't question. They get it and let me go. I return eventually there too.
I'm not saying I'm perfect and never incite any drama. I have and I'm sure I will again at some point in my life. They key is trying to learn from my mistakes and minimize future involvement. That said, I know what drama smells like and what to look for. I've seen the Horsemen of the Apocalypse and I know what to do - at the first sign, run until you can't anymore, find shelter, and wait for the holocaust to subside.
Maybe that classifies me as a shitty friend. Eh, kind of begs the question for me - who's the shittier friend? The one who brings the drama or the one who runs from it? Seems like a no brainer. Would a good friend willingly give a friend a communicable disease? Yeah, I didn't think so.
And that's where the rubber meets the road. I'm not going to make this a gay vs straight blog, not intentionally anyway. Gays have a lot of drama and I'm sure straights have an equal share. It's just that gay drama seems to splash in my direction while straight drama (as long as I'm not giving the impression that I'm pursuing someone's girlfriend or wife) keeps it's distance. I think it has to do with guilt by association or something. I'm gay so gay drama wants me. On the other hand, straight drama apparently doesn't even know I'm alive.
Thank God. At least there's someplace I can go to avoid drama. If it happens to be the straight world, so be it. It's funny watching young lesbians learn this lesson. They quiz me and quiz me and look at me with disdain when I talk about my straight friends. 'Who's going to have your back when the shit goes down?' is a familiar question. Interesting, shit seldom goes down around straight people, at least not shit I'm involved it. So, yeah... That's a moot point in my book. Then one day they see the light and tell me that they're tired of the drama and prefer hanging out with straight people. Realization comes eventually to all that want it.
In a nutshell, this is why I have few gay friends and even fewer close gay friends. Invariably they come with drama. It may not be right away, but sooner or later it's going to rear it's ugly head. God help anyone in the splash zone. At that point, as I see the tidal wave coming, I usually run. Sure it makes me seem like a shitty friend. 'I thought you'd have my back when the shit went down'. Uh, no. Bad assumption. Remember all our conversations about drama? Yeah, well... I was serious. I hate it to the point where I just don't do it. I usually return when the dust clears, but when dealing with my lesbian friends I always keep my running shoes handy.
Oh, I've been around plenty of straight drama. I run from that, too. My burden is simply less in that world. I guess my straight friends see me as different from them and as such (thankfully) not a key player in their menage a drama. When I run, they don't question. They get it and let me go. I return eventually there too.
I'm not saying I'm perfect and never incite any drama. I have and I'm sure I will again at some point in my life. They key is trying to learn from my mistakes and minimize future involvement. That said, I know what drama smells like and what to look for. I've seen the Horsemen of the Apocalypse and I know what to do - at the first sign, run until you can't anymore, find shelter, and wait for the holocaust to subside.
Maybe that classifies me as a shitty friend. Eh, kind of begs the question for me - who's the shittier friend? The one who brings the drama or the one who runs from it? Seems like a no brainer. Would a good friend willingly give a friend a communicable disease? Yeah, I didn't think so.
Comments
Post a Comment