According to Plan?
Things in life don't always go according to plan. It's not that I'm a negativist - I truly see the glass as half full - but there are these things called "variables". Some we can control and others, well... they have a mind of their own. Even those we think we've got a handle on, occasionally let us know that our grasp is illusory at best. The human body is a great example. We can do everything as right as we can - get rest, eat right, drink right, exercise regularly - but it can still let us down when we least expect it. And when we least want it to.
Suffice it to say that my weekend didn't go exactly to plan. And, in all honesty, I'm as much to blame as my body. No, I didn't get drunk at my book signing Friday night and spend all day yesterday hungover. Though I probably should have for as shitty as I felt. I hadn't had a migraine - like a real, nausea inducing, puke up everything including Pedialyte, feel like death migraine - in four maybe five years. I'm pretty good at immediately downshifting my life when I feel one coming on. If I can catch it early - when it's still just a really, really bad headache - a couple hours in a dark room usually do the trick. However if, like yesterday, I'm in the middle of a busy day with so much I want to do and accomplish and I ignore it - if I think it won't get any worse - I end up completely shellacked and barfing up a really tasty brunch (I won't be eating chicken and pancakes from Kerbey Lane - or anything raspberry - for quite sometime). Happens every time.
But here's the thing - I knew it was coming. I knew I was playing with fire. My body is so used to my - ok, let's call it - rigid lifestyle that I knew diverging from my routine was going to end up biting me. I had a little headache Friday that I really, really, really hoped wouldn't turn into anything. I'd been up super late (for me) the night before and got up far too early to sneak in a workout before the day got flying. I didn't rehydrate well afterwards and went on a walk/hike with friends and sweated some more. Then I spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing by the pool, probably dehydrating even more in the heat. On an ordinary Friday I wouldn't have been concerned, but this particular Friday was my book signing and release party. And given my track record for disappointment, I wouldn't have been entirely surprised if I'd had to cancel it for one reason or another at the last minute. Thankfully, I felt good enough that evening - spirit, mind, and body - and the event went off spectacularly without a hitch.
With the party and the after party, I finally got to bed around 1AM, an hour before I usually wake up. I slept fitfully for just a couple hours, probably from the excitement let down and because I'm not used to sleeping in the wee hours of the morning, and got up to start what was supposed to be a fun and eventful Saturday. I had the same breakfast as always, responded to a few messages and emails, and dropped a friend at the airport. That's when the niggling little headache I woke up with started to get worse. Then I met friends for brunch and about midway through I felt it transition. Stupidly (and because I never get to see these friends who drove in from Texarkana for my big weekend), I didn't leave right away. I didn't find a dark room and nap for a couple hours. By the time we finished eating and said goodbye in the parking lot, the point of no return was rapidly approaching. On the way home, which was less than ten minutes away, I felt my hands go tingly and my stomach began churning. You can re-visit the paragraph above for details.
Twenty-four hours and a visit from a mobile doctor later, I was back to feeling human. But I'd lost a day, a very important day, on my journey. A day that I expected to be great - time with friends, time with myself, maybe some good food - ended the moment I grabbed the waste paper basket. Oh, I did spend a little time with one friend - he brought me Pedialyte at barely a moment's notice and held my hand for awhile - however nothing about the day went as I'd hoped. Then there's today. I feel better but I still need a boatload of self-care and a calm atmosphere so everything I had planned - a long run and getting Part III of the trilogy ready for my publisher - slid right off the calendar.
I am truly thankful that the headache held off a day - there's no way I could have signed one book much less entertained fans and friends in the condition I was in yesterday, but f**ck I had such high hopes for the weekend. I guess the body knows what it needs and if we don't let it have it, it'll take it. My body apparently wanted rest - a day or two off from the rat race - and it got it. I finally pushed my body as far as it would let me before it pushed back. And it knew a migraine would do the trick.
Because I'm a glass is half full person, I'm trying to see the positive amid the disappointment. I used to get migraines of this caliber a couple times a year. That I haven't gotten one this bad in many, many years tells me I must be doing something - a lot of somethings - right.
Suffice it to say that my weekend didn't go exactly to plan. And, in all honesty, I'm as much to blame as my body. No, I didn't get drunk at my book signing Friday night and spend all day yesterday hungover. Though I probably should have for as shitty as I felt. I hadn't had a migraine - like a real, nausea inducing, puke up everything including Pedialyte, feel like death migraine - in four maybe five years. I'm pretty good at immediately downshifting my life when I feel one coming on. If I can catch it early - when it's still just a really, really bad headache - a couple hours in a dark room usually do the trick. However if, like yesterday, I'm in the middle of a busy day with so much I want to do and accomplish and I ignore it - if I think it won't get any worse - I end up completely shellacked and barfing up a really tasty brunch (I won't be eating chicken and pancakes from Kerbey Lane - or anything raspberry - for quite sometime). Happens every time.
But here's the thing - I knew it was coming. I knew I was playing with fire. My body is so used to my - ok, let's call it - rigid lifestyle that I knew diverging from my routine was going to end up biting me. I had a little headache Friday that I really, really, really hoped wouldn't turn into anything. I'd been up super late (for me) the night before and got up far too early to sneak in a workout before the day got flying. I didn't rehydrate well afterwards and went on a walk/hike with friends and sweated some more. Then I spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing by the pool, probably dehydrating even more in the heat. On an ordinary Friday I wouldn't have been concerned, but this particular Friday was my book signing and release party. And given my track record for disappointment, I wouldn't have been entirely surprised if I'd had to cancel it for one reason or another at the last minute. Thankfully, I felt good enough that evening - spirit, mind, and body - and the event went off spectacularly without a hitch.
With the party and the after party, I finally got to bed around 1AM, an hour before I usually wake up. I slept fitfully for just a couple hours, probably from the excitement let down and because I'm not used to sleeping in the wee hours of the morning, and got up to start what was supposed to be a fun and eventful Saturday. I had the same breakfast as always, responded to a few messages and emails, and dropped a friend at the airport. That's when the niggling little headache I woke up with started to get worse. Then I met friends for brunch and about midway through I felt it transition. Stupidly (and because I never get to see these friends who drove in from Texarkana for my big weekend), I didn't leave right away. I didn't find a dark room and nap for a couple hours. By the time we finished eating and said goodbye in the parking lot, the point of no return was rapidly approaching. On the way home, which was less than ten minutes away, I felt my hands go tingly and my stomach began churning. You can re-visit the paragraph above for details.
Twenty-four hours and a visit from a mobile doctor later, I was back to feeling human. But I'd lost a day, a very important day, on my journey. A day that I expected to be great - time with friends, time with myself, maybe some good food - ended the moment I grabbed the waste paper basket. Oh, I did spend a little time with one friend - he brought me Pedialyte at barely a moment's notice and held my hand for awhile - however nothing about the day went as I'd hoped. Then there's today. I feel better but I still need a boatload of self-care and a calm atmosphere so everything I had planned - a long run and getting Part III of the trilogy ready for my publisher - slid right off the calendar.
I am truly thankful that the headache held off a day - there's no way I could have signed one book much less entertained fans and friends in the condition I was in yesterday, but f**ck I had such high hopes for the weekend. I guess the body knows what it needs and if we don't let it have it, it'll take it. My body apparently wanted rest - a day or two off from the rat race - and it got it. I finally pushed my body as far as it would let me before it pushed back. And it knew a migraine would do the trick.
Because I'm a glass is half full person, I'm trying to see the positive amid the disappointment. I used to get migraines of this caliber a couple times a year. That I haven't gotten one this bad in many, many years tells me I must be doing something - a lot of somethings - right.
- I've learned to read my head. I can feel a headache coming on and tend to it as soon as possible.
- I've learned to read my body. I knew an endpoint was coming. I'd been running and gunning far too long without a real break. I'd just hoped I could make it through the weekend before the wheels fell off.
- I average more than seven hours of sleep per night and I go to bed and get up at roughly the same time every day, including my days off.
- I eat more fruits, vegetables, and whole foods, rather than processed garbage and fast food (Today's recovery demanded a Whataburger double with cheese, but that's an aberration).
- I cut out diet sodas and artificial sweeteners more than a year ago.
- I workout at an intense level six days a week.
- I drink alcohol sparingly. Once, or occasionally twice a week, I might have one drink (For as shitty as I felt yesterday, I should have gotten blitzed drunk after the signing Friday night. Result would have been the same).
- I moderate my caffeine intake. Except when I'm writing a lot, I have just two cups of coffee in the morning - one with my breakfast and one as I start my work day (I've been pushing my luck with this one and my body knows it).
I can bemoan the fact that I lost an important day (really two) to a migraine or I can make a pact to redouble my efforts at self-care - listen to my body even more intently and slow down when I feel that endpoint approaching. If I do, I'll be able to take a step back when, where, and how I want rather than my body screaming "NOW!!!" so loud that it knocks me into bed for almost twenty-four hours.
Tomorrow, it's back to work. Maybe at a slower pace for awhile. Maybe.
***Can't crawl out of bed to make it to the doctor? Check out Remedy.com. They may have mobile docs in your area. If I ever goof again and let a migraine get out of hand, I'm definitely calling them sooner. ***
Comments
Post a Comment